Not everyone is able to do what they love for a job. Okay, let's be real. Most of us aren't able to do that. I did for a few years. I thought theatre was my one true love and calling. Out of university I was able to secure employment at a professional theatre company and then at a professional opera company. I even moved to New Zealand to do an internship at a theatre company. I thought I was supposed to be working in theatre. I loved each of those jobs, but knew I wasn't going to make it a full-time thing. I just couldn't do it.
After theatre, I thought teaching was my calling. I taught in South Korea, the US and New Zealand for the better part of a decade. Convinced of my calling, I went back to school and gained a masters degree in teaching.
So what am I doing now? I bake part-time at a coffee shop.
Yep, that's right. I am employed to do a job that I need no previous experience or qualifications for. What led me to this job is the need for some sort of employment that doesn't require me to bring the job home. My personal life and the struggles we have led to me to leave education and find something that lets me leave the job at the end of the day.
So what does this have to do with a creative life?
These thoughts have come up because of a struggle I'm having with my husband at the moment. I am part of a team that organizes and runs a fringe theatre festival in my new hometown in NZ and as we get closer to the opening day, the stress gets higher. There are more demands of me this year as opposed to last year's festival and my husband is around now to see those demands and stresses. When he was on the night shift, he didn't see all that I was doing and now that he's on day shift, well...you get the idea. He doesn't want me out of the house as much and feels like I'm taking too much on. It is a lot, and it is stressful, but when I stopped being involved in theatre, I felt sad and missed it (a little bit).
My best friend does theatre as a professional and her life is hard. So hard and I couldn't do what she does. She is amazing and has chosen to stay in a theatre life while I have chosen to step away. But I still like to dip my toe in that water. The fringe festival is that water I wade in. Once a year, I am part of a group that brings an entire theatre festival to life and it's a huge accomplishment and I am SOOOOO proud of what I do with it. My husband doesn't quite get it.
The best friend said that it's important to me to still feel and use the training I have in some way. This festival is that outlet for me. It's exhausting since it starts up in January and by April, it's in full-gear. But after that one week in May? It's done and I'm back to my quiet life for the rest of the year.
So I am content with my day job and do what I need to do get paid for that, that is not my passion. I have had to find ways into myself to satisfy those creative urgings and feel like I am contributing something to the universe besides muffins and cookies. I know I won't be baking the rest of my life, and if my current resume is any indication, I'll likely be doing something else in a year or so, but I have worked hard to find outlets for my creativity and can proudly stand behind those things I do and claim them as my own.
So don't get disheartened by the day-to-day grind of a seemingly menial job, most of us don't have the luxury of working with our passion for a living. We just have to find a way out for our creativity, or a way in to our soul to remember why we are special.
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| My own creation: wood burning on Himalayan Cedar. |
